Sunday, June 13, 2004
What is it about T. (I think that is the initial that I use for him!) that makes me so crazy? On my birthday (last week) he was totally mean and disrespectful to me, and finally on Thursday we had mediation and made up. We made a tentative commitment to keep having these deep and meaningful discussions. As we were all leaving the mediation, he was still sitting on a couch and I was walking past him. He goes, "I didn't mean to upset you so much on your birthday," and I fall for it hook, line, and sinker. Kind of fun that we did that in the convergence space. I wish we had more of that "us" time, when we both ignore the rest of the world and hide in each other's arms. And kiss for hours.
But then of course now I am like, why hasn't he called me all weekend? I thought he had said he would call me Friday night (from when he called me earlier on Friday for some information). What the heck?
I really needed his support about some way fucked up shit that happened with the group we had been working with, too. I had a fever yesterday and was like arguing with people all day on the phone from my bed!
WTF!
So anyhow, one of my goals for our near-future talks is a "what are we" kind of a thing. It is so hard to get him to talk about his feelings and stuff. We had a what are we, goals kind of talk years ago and he couldn't say anything.
But it is interesting how the partner who I live with doesn't have that effect on me. I don't sit around obsessing about him when he is not here. I guess it is because I am really secure about where we fit into each other's lives. I mean, at this point, we live together! We have to communicate, etc.
email me at haydees@gmail.com
But then of course now I am like, why hasn't he called me all weekend? I thought he had said he would call me Friday night (from when he called me earlier on Friday for some information). What the heck?
I really needed his support about some way fucked up shit that happened with the group we had been working with, too. I had a fever yesterday and was like arguing with people all day on the phone from my bed!
WTF!
So anyhow, one of my goals for our near-future talks is a "what are we" kind of a thing. It is so hard to get him to talk about his feelings and stuff. We had a what are we, goals kind of talk years ago and he couldn't say anything.
But it is interesting how the partner who I live with doesn't have that effect on me. I don't sit around obsessing about him when he is not here. I guess it is because I am really secure about where we fit into each other's lives. I mean, at this point, we live together! We have to communicate, etc.
email me at haydees@gmail.com
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